End of Another Year

We just ended another year, 2022, as of the time I am writing this. Everyone seems to be thinking about what are their goals and new year’s resolutions for the upcoming year?

Maybe for most, it’s getting healthy?

Changing or incorporating a new fitness goal? or Maybe it has nothing to do with health in a physical sense?

Perhaps, this upcoming year, you simply want to watch less television, and/or Netflix? 

You want to spend more time outdoors and with your family. 

By cutting back or watching less screen time, will allow you to do what matters most of all.

Spending time with your loved ones. 

Healing Resolutions

  • What if I asked you about healing?
  • Would you have any resolutions when it comes to your healing?
  • What about grief?
  • Do you have goals or benchmarks that are centered around the grieving process?

I will be fully transparent and say that I probably didn’t either after my sister passed away. 

Grief was the last thing that I wanted to put on my long to-do list. 

Who’s to-do list isn’t long?

But, I knew that I wanted to begin healing after my sister had taken her life. I believed that it was possible. Not only did I choose to begin healing and finding ways to heal for myself, but 

Family Affair

I also wanted to find ways that I could make it a family affairWhat do I mean? But I quickly discovered why I needed to set benchmarks, resolutions, or other things like this…

Because I wasn’t the only one grieving in my household. My daughter, who had just turned 3 years old at the time of my sister’s death, was grieving. My husband was also grieving and wanting to support and help me grieve too. This intimate shared experience was not only affecting my “inner circle,” 

But, It also extended to my siblings, and yes, extended family. What about my friends? They were also saddened by the loss of my sister. 

They were grieving also. Remember from a previous blog, when I talked about grieving together? 

If you haven’t read it, be sure to go back and check out the blog where I discuss Ryan Reynolds’ character in a show that I watched on Netflix talking about grief. 

Daily Life Practices 

So as I began discovering how I could make healing become part of my daily life, I wanted to share with you some of the tips that I had found along the way. These tips can become resolutions that can help you heal after your own tragedy to suicide or grief in general. 

Let’s Begin…

Tip #1 – Find a new routine that incorporates grief processing.

I say “new” because it will be new for you. New year, new you! But even the grief process will be completely new. Maybe you’ve already experienced a loss prior to this one? But it is still new because the person is different or the loss is new. 

Tip#2 – Sunshine always does the body well

Vitamin D is one of the best ways for both our bodies and our mind to heal. So even if it’s cloudy outside or the weather isn’t the greatest, still find ways to get outdoors and enjoy letting nature do its magic.

Tip#3 – Talking to them

This might sound strange but just trust me when you open up the conversation with your loved one, it’s going to naturally bring healing into your life.

Tip#4 – Feelings game

Starting a “feelings” game is good for any age. Adults open up to how they are experiencing their emotions and before you know it even teenagers will slowly open up to how they are feeling.

Tip#5 – Daily check-ins

With yourself and with other people in your family. How do we know how others are doing if we don’t even take the time to simply ask? So ask. Ask yourself out loud, “How am I doing today?” Here is a secret… be honest with how you are feeling. Don’t try to hide it or cover it up. 

Creating the routine

Now that you have heard these 5 tips you can put these into resolutions that help you heal by creating a routine. What do I mean by routine?

It is great to have these tips nearby that you can glance throughout the day and notice how you are implementing them as the day goes by. I also recommend having a timeline where you are tracking your amazing progress so you have a visual of how you are doing. This could be a physical calendar that you buy stickers for and you get a sticker every time you do a tip?

Or digital planner that allows you to track your progress that way. Either way, just remember that you are doing the best you can. 

You are doing great!

Remember when I talked about giving yourself the gift of start? Of using this new year as a fresh start. 

A clean slate…

New beginnings to do something NEW. Rather than feeling as if I had to know everything all at once and have every detail in place. I concluded that I could simply give myself the gift of starting somewhere rather than not at all.

 I could give myself the gift of starting. Above all else, give yourself grace when you slip and fall off the wagon. Yes, there is absolutely going to be times when you feel like healing isn’t worth it…

That you should just do what everyone else does and simply ignore the problem. 

But like a wound, if we don’t treat it, it begins to ooze, get infected and quite frankly stink…

So let’s get the Neosporin, a bandaid, and let the healing “do its job.” 

Of mending our hearts. Making a once painful thing, less hurtful. Taking the sting of saying their name without tears coming to your eyes…

Being well, Feeling well. Or at least find hope again in your life.

Love Notes:

  • Creating something visual that you can track all of your amazing progress.(Inside the program, I’ve created a workbook that does this)
  • Tip#1: Incorporate new routine of grief processing 
  • Tip #2: Sunshine on a cloudy day
  • Tip #3: Talking to them
  • Tip #4: Feelings game
  • Tip#5: Daily check-ins. 
  • Having resolutions that not only help you heal but these ones can actually stick this time around. 

Love,

Crystal

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