It really is the question of the day isn’t it?
Does time in fact heal all wounds?
My answer is initially, “No.”
But let me explain why…
Time does heal and take the “sting” out of the wound.
So for instance,
After you lose a loved one to suicide,
The first year is extremely challenging to say the least.
It is a rollercoaster of emotions and ups and downs.
At least that was my experience for the first year after losing my sister.
So did time heal the wound of losing my sister during the first year?
I strongly believe that time is relative in this circumstance.
Just because it takes someone a year to grieve and process their loved ones passing doesn’t make someone else’s grieving process
Less than or greater to your own.
There are people who are still mourning the loss of their loved one years later…
Sometimes even decades.
I would be dishonest if I said, “Yes, it will only take you a year to grieve.”
When I don’t fully know the depth of the relationship that you had with your loved one.
My sister and I were close,
And I saw her practically every day…
Doesn’t mean that losing her was harder for me than for my mother or other siblings.
We each had a unique perspective about my sister and her life.
This is something that shouldn’t be taken lightly.
But it also doesn’t mean that I want you to stay “stuck” in your grief either.
Quite the opposite in fact.
I want you to begin healing after suicide, as soon as possible.
Because like me, you have people counting on you to be there and be an example of what being brave looks like.
Is it easy?
But the one thing that time does give you after this tragedy is that it lessens the sting that it had on you in the early days.
I can talk about my sister and not burst into tears (most times..)
I can look at my sister’s obituary and not feel guilty.
My daughter can look at her aunt’s picture and ask questions and want me to tell stories about her.
Beautiful stories that make me cry and laugh at who my sister was and is.
I love telling them!
It brings me such peace and joy to be able to have an open conversation with my daughter about her aunt.
To give her a glimpse into her aunt’s life,
That she never knew.
What an amazing gift!
To be able to share pieces of my sister’s journey with my daughter.
My daughter was three at the time of my sister’s passing.
But that was something that I realized afterwards…
That time was continuing on not just for me,
For my entire family as well.
That each new day is an opportunity to stand a little taller.
To be stronger.
To shine brighter.
This is what time does to the wound of grief.
I created something just for you as you are reading this.
I wanted to give you something that reminded you that each new day brings
Light and hope with it.
That time doesn’t have to be something we fear.
We embrace as “time goes by…”
May you continue to find peace in the days and time to come.
P.S. If you would like what I created for you, simply reach out to me on social media @scattering.hope and DM me for your reminder that each new day brings hope and light.
© 2022 Crystal Partney