Why it’s good to surround yourself with people who’ve been through what you’re going through.
Why Bother Surrounding Yourself with People?
It humanizes the process. What I mean by that is you see others going through a similar situation and quickly understand and realize that they are in the same boat as you. Navigating the day-to-day. Wondering where they went wrong or could’ve said something to prevent this. Having sleepless nights. Experiencing brain fog. Forgetting the basic things that used to be “easy” such as tasks like remembering to pick up dry cleaning or appointments.
When someone opens up that they have experienced a tragedy of this magnitude, it also allows room for love to enter into the equation. Not that love wasn’t there before, but love is what turns the sting that you feel in your heart, into warmth.
As my good friend Nancy Green, the founder of speakingofgrief.com, powerfully illustrates, “we now have this common bond between us. This unspoken language that didn’t exist prior to this tragedy.”
When Nancy gave this visual, I automatically felt as if we are sisters sharing one heart in a sense. She tragically lost her soon-to-be husband. I lost my sister. But we have this unseen thread connecting the two of us now. It is such a beautiful thing.
Strong Support System
Having a strong support system is key as you begin to process your grief. Your support system can be family. It can be friends. Church, synagogues, mosques, or any religious group you are affiliated with. It can even be complete strangers.
But you need someone in your corner who knows how you feel. Who is experiencing life with you? Alongside you. Ideally, lots of people, not just one person to help lift you up when you are feeling blue or simply need to cry.
Food and Healing
Tacos are not included but they are absolutely necessary in these moments. Why? Because when you lose a loved one to suicide, sometimes there are no words to describe the enormous amount of pain you feel. And because food has this incredible way of bringing people together and showing how much you care. So if you are the recipient of said tacos, you don’t have to do a thing but just sit in silence until you are ready to talk. Or if you want to talk.
If you are the person bringing the tacos, this is food for you to simply enjoy and politely remain quiet until spoken to. While I can only send you virtual tacos…
If you need someone to talk to I want to invite you to check out our page on Facebook or on Instagram and discover all the ways that we can connect with one another. When I was grieving and someone cared enough to check in with me and see how I was doing. This truly made all the difference in the world.
Remember, I want you to reach out and surround yourself with people who will support you and love you. Think of it as a warm hug as you find support from others who have experienced a similar loss as you.
For more information about suicide prevention be sure to check www.owlandthistle.com and if you want to find helpful tips, information, and tools if you lost a loved one to suicide or had a suicide attempt please visit www.scatteringhope.com.
Crystal Partney 💜