After reflecting on my own journey of healing after my sister’s suicide, I discovered that I wasn’t alone in seeking support, love, and most of all, hope for the days ahead. I had never experienced a tragedy of this magnitude before.
Yes, I was no stranger to loss. But to lose a loved one by suicide was a uncharted territory.
Not just for me, but for my whole family as well…
This included, my daughter who had just turned 3 years old, a few couples month prior
My husband, my mother, and siblings.
Extended family as well…
We all were craving next steps on how to even begin healing after this tragedy.
Prompting on my heart
That is why when I was brainstorming the type of program that I knew and felt in my heart that I must create, the timeline of 30 days kept coming back into my mind. Interestingly enough, when I was designing this NEW program, I initially wanted to be able to support and walk alongside you for the span of a year.
But as I got to talking and listening to each one of you, I discovered something along the way…
The very idea of having one year together felt overwhelming because YOU reminded me that you were wanting support and help in a shorter time frame.
For example, the vision of creating a life that not only brings joy, happiness and peace once again, will take a year’s time, it feels daunting…
Just even by me writing this, a part of it feels overwhelming and “holy cow Crystal, I have to wait a year to find peace, happiness, and joy again?”
It feels too much. I can’t do hard. I need simple. I need bitesize. I need manageable. Maybe you find yourself nodding your head in agreement? Especially when you are grieving. You are secretly craving something simple, not overcomplicated and definitely not overwhelming.
Then 12 weeks kept being on my heart after talking with so many other people just like you, who needed a roadmap, so to speak, and how to simply begin the healing process.
Personally, I found that taking the grieving process in smaller, bite-sized chunks allowed me to not become so overwhelmed.
By following only 30 day increments over the next 12 weeks, it also allowed me to not feel as if I had to tackle my mountain that I called “grief”, all at once.
I was able to spread it out over the 30 days and only focus on that month over a 12-week time span.
So that month to month over these next 12 weeks together could finally allow you to start.
To feel joy, happiness and peace again in my life after this tragedy. So where did I begin? Would it be possible to simply start the healing process?
Yes! Yes, I could start. Where did I begin….
Rather than feeling as if I had to know everything all at once and have every detail in place.
I concluded that I could simply give myself the gift of starting somewhere rather than not at all.
The Gift of Starting
I could give myself the gift of starting. If I’m honest, starting can be the hardest. That’s why when we craft what I call your Hope & Healing Plan, the first step is YOU deciding to begin. To simply start.
Because I can’t make this very important, and yes, I would even say, “crucial” step, for you.
I wish that I could, but I had to make that decision for myself. The same is true for you.
Isn’t this a beautiful thing? We get to choose! We get to decide!
We get an amazing opportunity each day (since this is the beginning of the new year) what better time than now?
To get a clean slate…
A fresh start…
Why not look back ten years or five years, or even simply 12 weeks from now and say to yourself, “I’m so glad I did that. Not only has it been a tremendous blessing for myself, but one that has completely changed my family for the better.”
Change, as they say, is inevitable. Why not, embrace it with enthusiasm, love, and above all, hope.
Because like I mentioned a minute ago, we get to choose…
How boring would life be if all of our decisions (as adults) were decided for us? (Because I have small children at home, I must say as adults)
I am reminded of the silly movie, Nacho Libre, where there is a scene in the movie starring Jack Black as the main character, and is in an orphanage and a little boy asks him, “Why do we always have to eat salad?”
Why are you always eating salad? Other than it’s “good” for you. But the movie does an excellent job at pointing out the obvious. The little boy doesn’t want to always have salad. He wanted to eat something different. Something NEW. Even something FUN!
I’m reminded of my summit that I hosted last year in July where one of the speakers who graciously joined me mentioned that she has her clients eat salad for breakfast. Interesting huh?
Not saying that salad is the new Mcgriddle, but you get the idea here of simply choosing a different path.
More tailored for you and designed by YOU. That’s what the Healing After Suicide program is centered around. YOU and YOUR healing.
Remember that you are creating a beautiful ripple effect that not only will impact your life but those around you.
The “Someday” Plan
Otherwise, we all tend to put our grief and our loss “on the shelf” and we will get to it “someday.” But I don’t know about you, but “someday” isn’t even on the calendar? Let alone, a day of the week?
So when we say the sentence, “someday I will do blank…” do you actually do it? If I am completely honest with myself, I typically don’t do whatever I said I was going to “someday” do. This applies to anything AND Everything under the sun…
A Few Examples
Someday I will “find” time to workout. One day I will not have a bazillion emails to delete and unsubscribe from in my inbox each day. Next year I will finally save up and go on the trip that I’ve wanted to go on for years with my family, instead of just dreaming about it.
Are you seeing the pattern?
Grief is No Different
Grief becomes no different than any other topic or goal that we know that we want to do or accomplish, but, never seem to actually make the time to do it.
So naturally, months, years, or even decades can pass us by and we still haven’t “dealt” with our loss.
Knowing This Familiar Pattern
Knowing this truth, I wanted to create a course that would take away this familiar pattern and habit. Because I know what it is like to “push aside” my grief and focus on other tasks at hand.
Quite frankly, any task was better in my mind than actually beginning the healing process. Cleaning toilets, checking my emails, going to the grocery store, you name it. I probably would’ve preferred those things. And I am not alone either in feeling this way. Once again, it was because I have experience in this, I created my 12 Weeks To Begin Healing After Suicide Without the Overwhelm.
This being the title of my NEW program. So I want to invite you to join me as we walk together to process our grief.
I’m an Active Participant also
Yes, I am an active participant too! Because while, you are beginning to heal, guess what? So am I!
My healing journey will only grow and evolve as will yours. And what better way to start than together? You can do this!
I do have to warn you though. It will not be rainbows and butterflies however, you can finally experience a sense of peace that I know in your heart you have been searching for all this time. That I know you are craving deep in your spirit and your soul for something more. Wanting not just joy, happiness and peace for yourself, but those around you too.
- You truly can begin the healing process and I can’t wait to see how your life is going to transform over the next 12 weeks together
- Stop eating salad everyday. Try something NEW.
- The “someday” plan doesn’t exist.
- Being an active participant in your grief journey
- Your grief journey will evolve and grow just like mine is.
- Finally experience a sense of peace that I know in your heart you have been searching for all this time.
- Craving deep in your spirit and your soul for something more.
- Wanting joy, happiness and peace for yourself BUT also those around you.
- This is what’s possible when you decide, when you choose to begin healing.
- What better way to start than together?
- Schedule your Hope & Healing Plan together today! We can create the future that you want to have moving forward. We can discuss the program in more detail as well.
- I want to personally invite you to put yourself and your life on the top shelf. Let this new year become the year that changed how you feel. How you remember your loved one. (Important to mention that I haven’t discussed how we’re going to remember your loved one yet because I want to think about you for a moment. How YOU are going to feel. What peace, joy, happiness looks like to you. Then, we can weave in your loved one and how you choose to remember them.)